The Workermonkey

bat-shit-retarded

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/31/2012 11:54:00 PM

http://www.baseballprospectus.com/article.php?articleid=18202

High school Ichiro enjoyed digging holes

if you can read this it's about a survey Ichiro Suzukli took in high school. he liked to dig holes as well in high school. this makes me think i also could have been a hall of fame baseball player.A+B=C.RNCi can't believe they did it. clint eastwood, wow. just amazing they allowed it. that's who people might vote for for president. the fact that there is still a choice is incredible. Tim, tell mike to shut his hole on Facebook. if i were Eastwood, i might try to get away with it too. vote Romney, he's trying to get away with it. of course he should be president.its sad but i can't wait until this generation of old people dies. they vote more then we do so they have more of an affect on the government then we do.

if Obama loses ii'm moving to Canada. or possibly Europe. Italy is nice too. it can't be worse than heree. it wouild also mirro m y carre path. leave before it get stoo bad. i'm trying at hte current place, and running our 5S program is giving me the opportunity, but the lady situation is forcing my hand. old people have been witness to more change faster than any group ever born. they aren't capable of handling it as a group because the yare subject to more info than nay group of humans ever created.

meet the parents:

tomorrow, Kate meets my parents for the first time. i'm a litte nervous but it should be ok. my mom was oddly nonchalant with me bringing someone up. that worried me the most. sunday she meets my sister an dher friends. the no sex, no city crowd. Brian, gest credit for the name. they are a dynamic 4-some.. i'm nervouss about hte whole thing but quite frankly, it has more to do with the trouble i'll be in once they all love each other. i'm in the biggest trouble here. fuck.

chapter 3:

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:44:00 PM

back west
bradford: redux
normal
national matt barone day
you have to keep your elbows locked
argue with a stripper, worst part? having to pay for it
data dump
wow, still good
normal
rumors
why is he so sketchy?
not cool
2 week notice?
shit is getting weird around us
on/off
stress
kidneys not doing so good
karma's been a real bitch lately
head split wide open
the cameras on
disapointment
4th of july
just another shitty birthday in a long line of shitty birthdays
i really hope that isn't true. i want to believe.
not talking because that's just over.
fuck euro-Disney.
2 weeks notice.

end chapter 3

potperie

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:42:00 PM

Sports: i know football is just starting but i'm still psyched for baseball. i don't know if anyone is watching but the wavier wire has been crazy this year. joe mauer just passed through unclaimed, the dodgers were able to get gonzalez, becket and crawford through unclaimed and theres been a lot of action in the background that's gone unnoticed. a lot of national league teams are far away from where they expected to be this year and have left some good players go to waivers. the crazy part is that they are passing through. a lot more players have made it through without being claimed than in years past. i guess the increase is major contracts has helped but still, its a bit odd. i think what the dodgers did was smart, money is cheap, talent is hard to get.

i'm also excited for the fantasy football season. i think my team is better than it's projections.

I've watched a lot of soccer lately. yes, a woman is behind that. i still don't get it, it really frustrates me that they don't' play it more like football (yes i get the irony of calling it soccer and football in the same sentance, cram it). i'm trying, i really am. i'm amazed to see how much money those players make, it makes those huge baseball contracts look like peanuts. amazing.

Life: anyone know some cool people in the NYC area? there's a 90% chance i move down there soon. most likely the northern jersey/NY border area. also, anyone know anything about that area? i'm going in almost blind. my biggest hang up is that its new jersey, ugh... yes, same girl behind this too.

mind blowers, each one I've heard about lately has blown my mind. shocking, yes. expected? no way. i can't say much though, i kind of understand. i have no leg to stand on here.

Work: the closer i get to leaving, the better it seems to be getting. i think my shit boss is actually getting pushed out. plus i just got put in charge of the 5S program. i hate the people i work with and i think its disgusting what we've managed to accomplish in a year with building a new building and I've let my VP know it, he seems to be on board with that idea. odd. so now i get to change it. i rock. so yes, work blows again and i haven't learned anything. i still suck with people. get used to it, you all know me well enough to know i'm stubborn and thick headed at this point.

Come my brothers and abide with me

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/28/2012 09:09:00 AM

Well, its official, I have been ordained as a Dudist minister. I can now legally perform marriages in some counties. If you ever feel the need to take it easy or just need some one to help you abide, drop me a line. The church of the Dude never turns away anyone!

Because we were such hardcore geeks...

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/25/2012 08:11:00 AM

We actually had another blog for it http://workermonkey-zombieapocalypse.blogspot.com/p/locations.html
But we ported it over in case anyone else felt so depraved that they wanted to contribute (you are always welcome to).

Timeline

Day 0: July 2nd, 2010. The Haddam boys all get together for the Macunas wedding. Everyone has a good time. Afterwords, the revelry transistions to the Looney household. A handful of the most ardent drinkers make it to 4 am.

Day 1: Baby wakes everyone up at 7 am. Coffee is made. Heads pound. Stomachs turn. Misery. Shortly after the house is shook by a powerful earthquake. Windows shatter, wood snaps, the house barely stands. A more powerful aftershock levels the house. Jesse, Burns and Matt head to the cars to check on their families. They barely make it to the end of the road when a powerful tidal sweeps up their vehicles. They are knocked unconscious in the tumolt. Upon waking, they find they are surrounded by devastation. The only other survivor is a very old man. They gather supplies, start a fire, eat. Not long after sunset it begins....

THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE

They survive the night in some cars. The zombies wail loudly and beat the cars. No one gets any sleep.

Day 2: Immediately at sunset the zombies fall to the ground together with a loud thud. A boat is found and prepared by Mike, who also finds a policeman's body and loots it. Matt finds a SWAT team member and Jesse finds a lumberjack. They load as much gear as possible into the boat:
200lbs of tools
200lbs of food and water
several tarps
120 gallons of gas
200 ft Rope
several small arms
a grill burner
2 spare tires
flashlights and batteries

Burns points out that the water is rushing west and is salty. He believes you are on a hilltop because the tops of telephone poles and trees stick out of the water. The boat is floated out and tied to shore. The men get some rest until nightfall. They are safe on the boat. During the night, the old man falls ill. Matt shoots the man in the head and throws the corpse in the water.

Day 3: By daybreak, the slip of land is gone, swallowed up by the rising tides. A decision is made to travel southwest. A days travel is slow. Night is spent safely on the boat.
Day 4: Smoke can be seen to the northwest. Upon arriving at the source, you find other survivors burning a large pile of headless corpses. This place is the "Beacon Heights Professional Center" the only standing structure for miles. Matt helps make water while Jesse tries to organize a leadership comittee. Here they meet the first two additions to their group, Ramirez (Iraq war vet) and Col. Ryan (retired NG colonel and civilian dentist). Everyone spends the night on the roof and is safe.
Day 5: More survivors show up. Ramirez leads an exploratory party off the island looking for water and food. The water level continues to rise. Night on the roof is very cramped.
Day 6: Some of the guards are missing at day break, and there were wierder than usual noises that night. Some people believe the guards took off, others believe that the zombies got them. The water continues to rise. Matt presses the group to abandon the site. The Colonel and Ramirez want the group to help them steal a boat and escape. Jesse, Matt, Burns, Ramirez, the Colonel, and two other men escape in two boats.
Day 7: Travel south by water.
Day 8: Travel south by water. They come across a highway that plunges right into the ocean. The highway sign reads Columbus 100 miles, Pittsburgh 75 miles, Philadelphia 50 miles.
Day 9: Travel south by water, now located somewhere in Virginia. On shore, in a motorhome, the meet Lou (musician). Matt fixes up the camper. Using a CB radio they make contact with the 82nd Army logistics company located 200 miles west at Kingsdale Industrial Park (KIP). The army uses a Predator UAV to guide them to the Park, which is secured and supplied.
Days 10 - 12: They make their way slowly, clearing cars and looting supplies. They keep their gas and food supplies at full. They also add:
50 lbs of Pharmacuticals
High powered, modern weapons from a walmart.
Police equipment.
Day 13: Travel was normal. Nightfall brings a strange creature, a screamer, that pounds the windsheild all night and screams at the occupants - but little else.
Day 14: They arrive at the outskirts of Kingsdale township and hole up in a Firehouse. Screamers make a racket all night.
Day 15: They arrive at Kingsdale industrial park. They are given two adjacent offices on the second floor of the Raytheon Robotics factory. The atmosphere is electric and positive. Everyone parties hardy into the night, gets warm showers, food and laid.
Day 16: Matt joins the scavenging parties, Jesse helps with corpse cleanup in the Toyota office building. Matt finds a backpack full of liquor and pills. Jesse befriends a local woman.
Day 17: Jesse works on securing the Toyota offices with the help of Lou and the two henchmen. Matt goes out looking for Solar panels. He finds four and gets 8 from the supply sheds at KIP.
Day 18: Jesse and Lou confront a screamer on the 5th floor while moving all the supplies into the building. Matt sets up the solar panels. Burns and Ramirez join scavenger parties and socialize at the robotics factory. Jesse and Matt find that the Toyota factory is infested with screamers. Jesse steps into the darkness to confront them, and they run away.
Day 19: Upon waking, they findout that the Robotics factory was briefly breached during the night. There is some damage to the main lobby entrance and there was a casualty. The locals say that a "zombie gorilla" had attacked. Jesse and Matt immedietly flee with the two henchmen and a 3 random women they convince to go with them. They take the camper but fail to bring any supplies other than what they were carrying. They spend the day retracing their steps back to the boats in Virginia.
Day 20&21: They slowely travel south. At night they catch a glimpse of these gorilla zombies (which look quite a bit like a Big Foot), which stomp and bellow amongst the zombies and screamers along the shore. They seem to throw tantrums at their inability to reach the crew in the boats.

day 35 prolog: the burns and ramirez adventure

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/04/2012 10:55:00 PM

when burns and ramirez figured out they were running low on drugs, someone had mentioned to them that maybe an old police station could have something in the evidence locker. them being the sort of fellows who would be interested in that type of thing decided to steal a motorcycle and find one.

they drove to the next town over and followed the signs to the police barracks. they found the building no problem but it had been ransacked and picked clean. a police station is a pretty high profile target during the apocalypse. they kept riding to the next town and the next town finding the same thing. they’d been on the road for three days and on their 9th station before they hit something.

when they got to the station it was covered in roamers. their presence had alerted most of them. they weren’t the quietest people, and they were a little high. it's not that they found no drugs in the other stations, they just found barely enough for themselves. when tripping face is the norm it takes a constant supply to keep you going. they’d found enough LSD to flash fry a kodiak, about an ounce of weed and a dozen grams of crystal meth at the several stations they’d already been to. this was enough to keep them going for now. the meth was not something they needed or wanted to do, but they’ll find a market for it, no problem.

they’d stopped on the side of the road to survey the station. the town had been built in a little valley with a small main street that intersected with the state road crossing through it. at the top of the hill was a gas station and a tackle shop. they pulled into the gas station hoping to find something.

their bike had been easy to keep fueled, there were more then enough abandoned cars on the road to with gas in them. they couldn't’ carry much so it really was just a drug run. they’d marked some locations where’d they left supplies so they could come back later with a bigger vehicle.

the gas station had been sacked already but plenty of food still on the shelf. surprisingly, there were lighters, sodas, bottles of water and plenty of stuff still untouched here. ramirez was a little skeptical since this seemed too good to be true. they decided to set up camp for a few minutes and fill up on food and supplies. it was a rare opportunity they could gorge on extra food. ramirez grabbed all the nuts and protein bars he could while burns grabbed twinkies and honey buns while washing it down with monster energy drink and mr pibb.

looking down into the valley they could see the police station right on the corner of the highway and main st. there were a few other shops around it that had been broken into but not fully looted. there were a lot of zombies roaming the streets all around it. the other buildings and narrow streets had kept them all kind of confined in the bowl of the valley. they weren’t really able to get out. it looked at is they were being collected by the mountain range, a zombie pond in its valley.

this posed a problem, they couldn’t get close to the police station with all those zombies around. burns was getting a bit jittery, he needed to smoke. ramirez was full and content for now after having eaten. he was more interested in relaxing and being happy for a few minutes. while they sat in silence eating, burns got up and walked over to the propane cage and found a few cylinders in it. they were empty but still had enough juice to be dangerous. burns tuned to ramirez and in a cold, monotone voice stated: “i’ve got a plan”.

ramirez was more concerned with the plan than the zombies. burns opened the cage and took two propane tanks, tied them to the bike and started it up. “come on, we can do this, there's not that many of them.”
“not that many? they are all over the place, how are we going to clear them out, we don’t have enough ammo and if we just started shooting we’d attract more?!”
“What? why would we shoot the poor lost ?” the poor lost? fuck, burns had more acid than we thought. ramirez is now scared more of burns on acid wielding a gun and propane tanks than zombies freely roaming around them.

burns hauled ass towards the center of town. ramirez just tried to stay on the bike and didn’t have time to ask questions. they took a left a hundred yards or so from the station and then towards an apartment complex on the edge of the populated area. the roamers were scattered enough that they could get past them and not attract too much attention. as they got closer and closer though, they were being followed by more and more slow moving roamers.

they pulled up alongside of the main entrance to an apartment complex with 4 small buildings that housed maybe 60 people total. it was packed next to another gas station and a small auto shop on one side, a check cashing service and chicken and waffles house on the left. burns stopped the bike but left it running.
“wait here, i’ll be right up, inside. i’ll start it.”
“fuck me, you’re tripping balls aren’t you? damn it, what are we doing here?”
burns looked at ramirez with bewilderment and stated: “the movers need to see the light.”
“the light? what light? its going to be dark soon, there's no light here, man, get your shit together or you’re going to get us both killed!”
burns replied, “i’m going to start the light” and grabbed both propane tanks off the bike. he walked up the stairs and kicked open the main door to the complex. ramirez stayed on the bike and took a look around. the street out in front ran down towards the center of town and off up the hill in the other direction. there were mostly old colonial houses around with a few small shops sprinkled in between. not much room to run and a ton of places for roamers to hide. this area wasn’t safe at all.

just before ramirez was ready to freak out and head in after burns, he heard a gunshot inside. burns immediately pushed the front door open and walked quickly towards the bike. “what the fuck was that asshole! a gunshot? you're going to draw too much attention to us! they can hear that all over the valley! fuck man, we got like 2 minutes to get out of here before every dead head in a 5 mile radius comes down on us!”

“yeah, good. lets go now”
“umm.. you ok? fuck how much did you drop up there? damn it get on the bike we need to leave.”
“no, go to police.”
“go to police? you’re fucking done man, just god damn fried aren’t you?”
“go”
hiissssSSSSSS BOOOOM!!!!!!!
“WHATTHEFUCKWASTHATASSHOLE!” the front of the building had just blown up and was currently in flames. the propane tanks must have gone off.
“i blew up the tanks. that should draw the movers and show them the light.” ramirez just looked at him with a cold blank stare, that ball tripping prick had worked up one hell of a distraction and was high enough to have no clue what he was doing. that magnificent bastard.

burns had started a fire in the middle of the floor. one of the propane tanks was sitting in the middle and the other was in the next room. the gunshot had been burns shooting a hole in the tank in the other room, the room was filling with gas while he walked out. when the main fire finally reached the other room it had ignited, and both tanks had blown up. the whole complex would be on fire soon and the noise was loud enough to attract everything within 10 miles, zombie or not.

“holy shit, we got like no time man, if this is your plan, lets fucking skip the acid next time” ramirez threw burns across the back of the bike and took off towards the police station. every roamer they passed was headed to the fire. they’d heard the noise and were headed towards it. the street to the police station was not clear but all the zombies had other priorities, the distraction seemed to be working. like moths to a flame the “movers” were headed to the fire.

all the glass in the front of the building had been broken and there were a few signs of struggle in the front of the station. it looked like a grenade had gone off in the lobby and blown everything to bits. there were a few dead bodies and a few roamers in there but nothing ramirez couldn’t handle with an axe. burns was a fucking mess, he’d been licking the leather seat of the bike for the last 5 minutes and drooling over the prospect of “soft, golden, rectangulars”.
“fuck man, just hold on long enough to get out of here, i’m going to look around”.
there wasn’t much to see, this was a small town and it looked like most of the guns had already been taken. quite a few dead bodies around here though, maybe there was a shoot out. ramirez was looking for the evidence room though, thats what they were after.

wondering the halls of the station was strange, a few abandoned offices, bathrooms, empty cells, not much more than what you’d expect in a small town. he had found the maintenance room and entrance to the garage but no evidence locker yet. there was a guard booth by the gate to the police parking lot. ramirez went over to it to see if maybe there were some keys handy. there were a few cars in the lot and a swat van he was eyeing in the corner.

the booth was only a few feet square but held the most amazing thing he’d ever seen. a 12 gauge shotgun under the counter and a board full of key rings to all the different cruisers. he grabbed a handful but there was one that especially caught his attention. it had a skull pendant on the key ring right next to a hello kitty USB drive. odd thought ramirez, he didn't’ see any pink cruisers and there weren’t any hyundais in the parking lot :)

he took the fist full of keys over to the closest cruiser with no luck. the next car over opened up right away but had no gas in it. he’d be better off with the bike. the third car over was an old crown vic but it had a boot on it. car number 4 wouldn’t even open. the swat van was the only one left.

rumble rumble krrrruuuuccCCCKKKK!! THOOM!!!! there was a brutal rumble in the background and suddenly the ground had shook with a rapturous explosion in the distance. ramirez ran past the booth and out into the street behind the station trying to see what happened. there was a 60 ft fireball coming from the direction of the apartment complex they’d just been at. best bet was that the gas station next door had gone up in flames and the underground tanks had blown. this was a problem, there's no way that went un-noticed.

“fuck i need to get burns and get out of here. this going to get ugly fast.” ramirez ran towards the swat van for one last try. he needed a car to run over any walkers that would be in the way, a high speed escape wouldn’t be possible without something that could plow through all the zombies they’d come across. those explosions would attract them all, from all over, they’d be running into hordes of walkers, and going against the grain.

the swat van was open on the side, it looked like a navy blue UPS truck. when ramirez got in, he immediately noticed that it was still fully loaded. there were kevlar vests, mp5 navys, handcuffs, riot gear and smoke grenades all over the floor in the back. this thing was a jackpot! ramirez went through almost every key he had in the ignition with no luck. the last set was the one with a skull and hello kitty thumb drive. “really? there's no way this po-dunk town has a hello kitty swat van... no way...” the key fit the ignition perfectly and started the van on the first turn. “damn it, damn it. fucking pussy’s.” he drove the van over to the booth and opened the gate. a few roamers stumbled in but he could just push through them in the van. burns was still around front and he needed to collect him before anything went wrong.

plowing over a few zombies to get to the front of the building was no big deal, this van could handle quite a bit. they were still headed in the direction of the fire. it was a surprising amount of zombies that were headed into the valley and over towards the explosions. ramirez didn’t have time to worry about it though, if they stayed much longer they’d just be over run by crazyness. he pulled up to the front of the station and got out looking to burns.

ramirez found the bike but burns was nowhere in sight. “fuck, where did that retard go?” he looked in all the immediate rooms with no luck. the first thing to go through his head was asking how long he waits for burns. was he worth it? he’d just be using more of his drugs, not something he had enough to share. was it worth it? how long would this last? burns was just as likely to stab him in the eye with a pez dispenser as he was to share some mescaline. he headed back to the van when he stopped to smell the air. it smelled like burning rubber, what the hell?

just then, ramirez hears a crash and then sees the wall of the lobby give way to a hulk busting out into the street. the cement block scattered across the street and laid waste to all the cars parked on the side of the street. in one fell swoop it flipped a car and kicked a post office box. ramirez dropped a nut and let out a weak chirp in utter panic. a hulk was nothing to be messed with and if you caught it’s attention you were fucked. it just wanted to kill everything and was simple enough to just smash anything that was dumb enough to move within eyesight. if he wanted to live he’d have to sit still and just wait it out. at this point fuck burns, escaping a hulk was far more important.

don't underestimate burns. the second ramirez had given up on him, burns came ripping through the lobby in a tow truck and slammed into the zombie hulk. it let out a eye popping scream and went through two walls when the truck hit it. burns casually stepped out of the vehicle and walked towards the limp creature. the wall had been devastated and opened up some new rooms. the tow truck had smashed the hulk through the building next door but had also opened up new areas of the police station.

burns wandered off towards the garage when ramirez ran over to him. “get in the fucking swat van ASSHOLE AND DONT FUCK UP OR GET YOURSELF KILLED, JUST SIT STILL DAMN IT!!” holy shit, ramirez ran over to where the hulk had gone through the wall. the hulk was launched into a room he’d missed before, full of plastic tubs. holy shit this was the evidence room! those tubs were full of evidence from different cases. he ran back towards Burns, “get over here! we need to open these and bring them with us!!” ramirez ran over as if the strength of a thousand men had just hit him and started fervently opening the plastic containers looking for anything useful. burns just stood there like a doof and watched, high as balls. the first few were nothing but papers but ramirez eventually found one which caught his attention. “fuck me.... jackpot.”

burns looked alive for a second and walked over. ramirez had found a tub with 8 kilos of coke in it. the next tub over was a bit heavier and had the same case number on it. that one contained 32 pounds of pot and a QP of heroin in it. holy shit. the next one was the same case number, 3 pounds of crystal meth.

this was taking too long, the hulk was starting to make noises and come to. ramirez handed one of the tubs to burns and pointed him in the direction of the swat van. ramirez grabbed one himself and ran towards the van. he was able to run back and grab the third tub while burns stumbled across the street. the hulk was still just groaning on the floor. ramirez went back for a third run when he heard a howl coming from the station.

the hulk had come to. it jumped up in a fit a rage and smashed through the building blindly. it had run head first into the garage and thrown a fit. ramirez ran back to the van and grabbed burns. throw burns in the back with the drugs, and ge the engine started. that tws the goal. he got burns into the side of the van and then jumped in the driver seat. as soon as he’d sat down, the hulk had burst through the front of the building, smashing another parked car. they were in trouble.

ramirez jammed the keys into the ignition and punched the gas pedal. they needed to get out of there. the hulk heard the engine jump and the squeal of the tires. ramirez turned the corner and headed up out of the valley. the hulk jumped up to the rooftop of the building across the street of the police station, let out a deafening roar, and then jumped down on top of a garbage truck behind the speeding swat van.

“oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.....” screamed ramirez as he tried to drive away from the hulk. it wasn’t working, the hulk was just gaining on them and breaking valuable shit in it’s path. they tried to swerve down a side street and then loop back around to the main road. not much luck, the hulk was waiting for them, they had to swerve around a smashed car and through a pizza hut parking lot before they could get back to the state highway. the hulk was undeterred, it plowed through a bob's big boy front lobby before jumping onto a red roof inn and monkey stomped a ho-jo’s. ramirez cut a right down a wooded side road in a n effort to avoid the hulk chasing them. all they got was some crazy noises in the woods. the hulk jumped from one side of the road to the other and back again, it slowly got further and further away until the tree thrashing got quieter and quieter. as they raced down the side road and further out of town, the hulk noise got softer and softer. eventually ramirez made a right hand turn. an hour later he slowed down and eventually stopped on the side of the road.

“dude...”
“did you use my mace?”
“don’t know, i don’t remember doing it.”
this was the only conversation between them until they got back to the facility. 2 days’ of awkward silence was punishment enough for them both. they didn't have to talk about what happened or go over it in detail. what happened happened. move on. the zombies would only follow them so far and the hulk had seemed to give up on chasing the van. on the second day, burns came to and started acting normal again. he’d been off his “meds” for 48 hours now and things were starting to seem normal.

the next morning they experienced a blowout. the left rear tire blew out and they were stuck on the side of the road. burns got out and surveyed the damage and the surroundings. the van looked fine other than the flat tire. he grabbed the spare off the back and started to change the tire out. ramirez got off the van and headed to the side of the road to take a piss. the birds were chirping, squirrels were crossing the road and everyone was loose. from here they had about another mile to go until the compound. so close, ramirez grabbed an extra gun and checked all his ammo pouches. burns smoked a bowl and slammed a nip of jack daniels. they both got back on the van and strapped in. burns drove back towards the facility and did so in a hurry. the closer he got the more he could feel something chasing him.

about a quarter mile form the complex the trees started to move in circles. it sounded like a herd of buffalo were moving through the landscape. the noise grew louder and louder, drowning out he screams of the panicked. a hulk had jumped over the top of the tree line and the towers of the factory had seen it. they were on high alert and preparing for the worst. the swat van was still on route home to the facility and was hauling ass. they had no intention of waiting for the walkers to show up without the reinforcements of the factory guards.

unfortunately they did. with about a hundred yards to go to the compound, the swat van was pinned, there was a hulk coming up hard on their ass and wasn’t going to stop with a fence. it was wailing and smashing everything in it’s path. the guards on teh towers had picked up the hulk with binoculars but hoped it would take a different route to get here. the noise of the swat van hauling ass towards the compound had given the hulk plenty of queues as to where everone was. just follow the noise. ramirez had the swat van pinned, the hulk was gaining ground but still smashing everything it its sight. it was jumping from one side of the road to the other, smashing everything. the factory had built towers four stories high at this point. they saw the hulk coming from a mile away. there was a 2 man team on the op of every tower for the factory. one guy to point the gun and one guy to feed it.

two towers were in range of the hulk when it first came over the horizon. the swat van was driving in a zig zag pattern on it’s way in. the hulk was all over the place and the van was just a rabbit running its course. the hulk was coming up hard on the van when the tower guns let loose on the hulk. they were throwing minigun rounds at the hulk with ease. the first few took out its legs and then moved on to head shots as it laid in the street motionless. this just kept it busy. the swat van busted ass to get tot the gate, the hulk just wanted to smash and had to fight against 3000 slugs a second. it didn’t take long for the hulk to slow down and get shredded by the the tower guns. they were relentless and took their foe down a peg when they opened up on the enemy. the army still had a few highly effective weapons tucked away.

burns and ramirez ended up strolling into the compound with 30 pounds of weed, 6 kilos of coke, a QP of heroin and 2 pounds of meth. (don’t try to do the math, there's’ taxes at every stop). this should keep the bar going for a while. they’d brought back enough drugs to keep everything going for awhile. all it took was the towers to burn all their ammo on a hulk, burning a small town to a crisp and destroying a swat van tryin to get back to town. worth it? fuck yeah it was.

The Workermonkey

Friday, August 31, 2012

bat-shit-retarded

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/31/2012 11:54:00 PM

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

chapter 3:

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:44:00 PM

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potperie

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:42:00 PM

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Come my brothers and abide with me

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/28/2012 09:09:00 AM

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Saturday, August 25, 2012

Because we were such hardcore geeks...

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/25/2012 08:11:00 AM

Timeline

1 comments
oh yeah, forgot about this. should we keep it going? we should have some kind of consolidated history of the zombie adventure. i've saved the ones i've written in a google doc.

By Supreme Monkey Overlord, at Wednesday, August 29, 2012 7:18:00 PM
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Sunday, August 19, 2012

# posted by josh @ 8/19/2012 10:36:00 PM

1 comments
Hey, don't overestimate no pants day!

By bb, at Tuesday, August 21, 2012 11:13:00 AM
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Saturday, August 04, 2012

day 35 prolog: the burns and ramirez adventure

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/04/2012 10:55:00 PM

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Friday, August 31, 2012

bat-shit-retarded

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/31/2012 11:54:00 PM

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

chapter 3:

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:44:00 PM

0 comments Post a Comment

potperie

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/29/2012 08:42:00 PM

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Come my brothers and abide with me

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/28/2012 09:09:00 AM

0 comments Post a Comment

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Because we were such hardcore geeks...

# posted by NoBrainRequired @ 8/25/2012 08:11:00 AM

Timeline

1 comments oh yeah, forgot about this. should we keep it going? we should have some kind of consolidated history of the zombie adventure. i've saved the ones i've written in a google doc. By Supreme Monkey Overlord, at Wednesday, August 29, 2012 7:18:00 PM Post a Comment

Sunday, August 19, 2012

# posted by josh @ 8/19/2012 10:36:00 PM

1 comments Hey, don't overestimate no pants day! By bb, at Tuesday, August 21, 2012 11:13:00 AM Post a Comment

Saturday, August 04, 2012

day 35 prolog: the burns and ramirez adventure

# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 8/04/2012 10:55:00 PM

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1 comments
oh yeah, forgot about this. should we keep it going? we should have some kind of consolidated history of the zombie adventure. i've saved the ones i've written in a google doc.

By Supreme Monkey Overlord, at Wednesday, August 29, 2012 7:18:00 PM
Post a Comment

1 comments
Hey, don't overestimate no pants day!

By bb, at Tuesday, August 21, 2012 11:13:00 AM
Post a Comment