The Workermonkey

Friday, September 17, 2004

another weekend 

# posted by josh @ 9/17/2004 01:19:00 PM

brancy and ron, fantastic posts.

i think the walk you took, brancy, is one of the best things you can do for yourself. so often i also feel that i have no time, i'm rushing everything. it's been a pretty constant feeling since i got to columbia a month or so ago. go to class, do my work, feed the dog, give the dog attention, do more work. it's friday afternoon, just got home from class an hour or so ago, and i still feel stressed and rushed. this is supposed to be the most relaxing time of the week for people who go to school or work m-f, yet i'm not relaxed. and your walk touches on something. i try to golf now and then. an expensive habit, like rons, if i do it enough. but i'm backed up. my hobby depends partially on weather. it's rained every weekend each of the last 4 weeks. i havent played in like a month. watching mindless tv is one thing, but it's not totally relaxing. without relaxation , you'll burn out in a heartbeat.

it almost seems unfair at times. you're cruising along in undergrad, then SMACK--reality slaps you across the face with it's dick, almost without warning. i find myself not only worrying/stressing/rushing about things happening today, tomorrow, next week, but i also need to consider my future. perhaps an example would be more clear:
usc is not a top 20 law school. without being in the top 20, your chances of beign able to get a job anywhere you want are not good. your best bet is regional. well, being down here, i've learned i do not wish to live here (now, coincidentally, i didnt have much of a choice in going to usc, so its not something that was in my control before). the area is ok, but i would never settle here. i dont like the people. they hate northerners for the most part. but my commitment here is more than 3 years of school, since its not a top 20 school. so i could be screwed. due to this, i'm going to most liekly attempt transfer (AGAIN). but see what i mean? i have to look 3-4 years into the future, to decide what i do in a couple months (start applying for transfer). ridiculous.

so life does spin you around and round. i'm doing my best right now to at least slow the spinning down to where i can control myself w/in the spin. i guess thats 'all i can do

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