The Workermonkey

Wednesday, April 28, 2004

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# posted by Supreme Monkey Overlord @ 4/28/2004 06:41:00 PM

(one shot)

I’m not exactly in a good mood right now. I’ve got an inspector who seems determined
to get me to fix the wrongs that have been created at my company over the last 20 years.
None of which I have time to do or the desire to do them. If he over steps his bounds, hes
replaced by an inspector who won’t. But he’s clever and has more time to avoid his lack
luster marriage than i do. Next, I’m arguing with Joe because after twenty minutes of
clam, under control discussion, i’m unable to explain the concept of a “box”. I’m also not
going to waste my time making frivolous drawings that take time so that only he can see
them in full size. Plus, no matter how you do it, 1.315 - 0.322 + 0.625 does not equal 1.5.
i can’t draw it any differently, i can’t add or subtract anything else. its just not going to
fit. After 45 minutes of “cool down” time, i can still leave work with a smile. I’m actually
amazed at myself for this. Until the ride home, this is when it all goes to shit. Some
asshole in the right lane decides its a good idea to pull out in front of me while hes going
45. Trying to kill me doesn’t make me happy. Still OK though. when I pull up to the
stop sign at the end of the off ramp, I’m flipped off by a woman driving an SUV and
talking on the cell phone while she blows through a stop sign. THATS IT!!

(two shots)

During my “cool down” time today I managed to check out the usual suspects of internet
sites that I visit on a daily basis. good. While rolling down the list of headlines on the
right I’m amazed to see this string of events that are considered news worthy:

Kerry defender blasts Cheney as 'chicken hawk'
Madrid train bomb suspect indicted in 9/11 attacks
High court hearing 'enemy combatants' cases
Music industry sues 477 more file sharers
Toddler found alive 30 hours after crash killed father
Elton John calls Idol vote “racist”
Bush campaign “says something negative about kerry’s military records”
Kangaroo awarded medal of honor

What? mudslinging, war, terror, getting sued for listening to music, horror story,
American idol. bush criticizing medals of honor, and a kangaroo getting one. a kangaroo.
seriously. a fucking kangaroo. I’m torn, either Kerry’s medals are meaningless or bush is
such a retard that a kangaroo could get a medal before he does. at least the kangaroo was
below the American idol story. I think this is a positive.

(three shots)

I wish I could show you all the article I read in scientific American about how choice and
awareness makes people depressed. I really think that they summed up how I feel
sometimes very well and why I can really see no reason that people can walk around very
happy all the time. These people scare me. the ones who always have a smile on their
face and nothing seems to get then down. even when they shouldn’t be happy they still
smile. I know of at least one case in my life where I’ve met a person who was really
messed up but delt with it but just acting happy. there was no winning with this person.
i’d be surprised to hear that this person hasn’t broken down or gone nuts yet. the only
people i know who truly walk around all day with a smile on or can really say they are
totally happy with life are complete morons.

(four shots)

people so dumb that it amazes me they make it through the day without falling down
more. but you know what, I envy these people. no matter what happens they are still
happy. like a dog wagging its tale, they are happy. blind, unknowingly, truly happiness.

(five shots)

but you know what. I still have nothing to complain about. I live in America, I’m white, I
have a good job and a little money in my pocket. I still get up every morning to the
ungodly sound of a buzzing alarm clock and stick my face in the relentless machine I call
society. And to what ends? what keeps me going? its hope. hope that tomorrow will be
better that today and that by some incalculable chance that my actions will make it better
for myself or someone like me. I can’t fix the worlds problems for all the stoned energy I
exert trying to, but I can fix some of the little things around me and thats a start.

(six shots, and a nice little joint)

I deal with my problems. maybe not in the best way possible but it works for me. booze
and drugs have been working for millions of people for hundreds of years so why not.

things will be better, weather I’m lying to myself or not. so far society has done nothing
but show an over all upward trend. technology continues to progress no matter what
those fucking religious conservatives think. with any luck I’m going to change the minds
of religious people and help their subsequent children by doing so. over the next few
generations I’d like to think that religion is going to do away with it’s self but that doesn’t
seem to be the case. our population is growing and its the people with a lower intelligence
that are growing faster and it is these people who are more easily drawn to religion.
they’ve already gotten a president elected that has the same fucked up views they do so
anything is now possible.

I’d love to continue but I feel that I need to change subjects

(I don’t know how many shots anymore but I’m on my second tequila drink)

Those fucking Yankees are driving me nuts, muessena has got to snap out of this funk and
pitch better. my fantasy team is sorely lacking quality pitching even for the guys I have.
but they’ll come around. its still early in the season no matter what anyone says. its nice
to see that Texas, Baltimore, San Diego and Cincinnati can enjoy a love affair with first
place.

OK, if you think I sound a little off kilter, you’re right and there is a very good reason for
it, I’ve been having a slight health problem that can be found here that has been fucking
with me the last few months, but rest assured I’ll be OK and I’ve been working with my
doctor to fix the problem. I hope you all enjoy the new layout of the site and that it will
help put an emphasis on the content instead of the odd little bits I decide to put o nhte
side. I think each of you will be surprised what pops up when you type “workermonkey”
or “multipurpose workermonkey” into any search engine (some of those are things i’ve
posted on message boards where “workermonkey” is my board name (the best is the
political posts ending up on the “Clark for President” sites (that and i’ve been in contact
with the person who owns workermonkey.com)(no i can’t have it))).

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